Thursday, September 17, 2009

Man, I hate Tucker Carlson (And if you hate Fox News- read this)

Besides the giant misnomer of Fox's "fair and balanced" news policy, which, by extension, applies to Carlson and invalidates any journalistic accolade he has ever achieved- Carlson is, in his own right, a moron. Earlier today, I found a link to a Fox News Special titled, "Do You Know What Textbooks Your Children are Really Reading?" In my mind, I thought, "Well I'm going answer that question with a question of my own- Does Fox News know the secret? Do they really know what our children are reading?" Alas, fifteen minutes into the program, my question was answered- of course Fox News doesn't know, especially Tucker Carlson. He's an idiot.

One of his gripes with today's textbooks is that, on the subject of international discourse, "terrorism is not identified as Islamic." I guess Tucker, in his quest for fairness and balance, forget about the IRA in Ireland, the Revolutionary Armed Forces of Columbia (FARC), and the Revolutionary Nuclei in Greece; just to name a few.

He later went on to say that "Out of 307 million Americans, only 1.7 million identify themselves as Muslim American-- that's less than 1% of the population. And yet, over the past two decades, Muslims have had considerable influence over textbook content." Essentially, you listen to people based on their proportion in the population. And as Stephen Colbert joked, since Tucker is Episcopalian, and there are only 2.4 million Episcopalian Americans, then you should only listen to .08% of his 60 minute special. That's 28 seconds.

I should have listened to Colbert. After watching 15 minutes of Tucker's garbage, I walked outside to do something less painful- soak my face in a iron bucket of battery acid.

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